#niathoughts – how to attack life ft. seeking a friend for the end of the world

I often spend my nights running through the endless field of weeds (and spontaneous roses) that is Netflix. I can often be an indecisive person so something as extensive and never-ending as Netflix can be a source of anxiety for me. Even though I want to find something new, fresh, and interesting to watch I have so much to choose from that I stress myself out, and end up watching another The Office episode for the seventeenth time.


First world problems, I know.

Last night, I stumbled across a movie that I’ve been vaguely aware of for years now: Seeking a Friend for the End of the World. With Steve Carell (a.k.a Michael Scott) as the movie’s front-runner, I figure that it would at least keep me interested through the flick’s run-time. Now that it’s over it’s got me thinking. Movies these days rarely get me to do that sort of thing.


Grasping the finality of death is something that many people shy away from. But, when you’re met with the impending doom of the apocalypse you really have no choice but to face it. In this movie, the main characters are given a sure-fire date of their demise. It happens to be three weeks from the start of the movie. That’s not a lot of time at all.

It just makes me think, what would I do if I (along with everyone else) only had three weeks to live? How would I attack life? One of the most important questions I pondered over was who would I want to spend time with? It’s honestly saddening to wonder about, but I’m thankful that situation isn’t my personal reality.

The movie just made me realize that you don’t have to be facing catastrophic circumstances in order to go after what you want. Lately, my life’s been at quite the stand-still and I’ve been stuck in a monotonous routine. But, life’s about taking risks. It’s about putting forth the effort to experience firsthand the beautifully awkward and wonderful world around you.

I challenge you, random-reader, to do something for the first time today. You don’t have to do something drastic first off. Broaden your horizons just a smidge. Whether it be going to a different place for lunch or finally take up journalizing, shift your routine. Thankfully you don’t have the fear of the apocalypse looming over your shoulder so changes can be more gradual if you need them to be. It all starts with the first step.

Or, you can just skip all the steps and make that move across the country to Los Angeles to be with your first love that you’ve always been day-dreaming about. It’s all up to you. It’s cool how life’s like that.





I love Insecure.


It’s been a while since I’ve seen a show that’s so unapologetically black. I swear the room smells like cocoa butter every time I have the pleasure of watching this program. Being a black woman in today’s society, it’s hard to find a TV show with characters that represent you accurately. But Insecure, let me tell y’all. That is MY show.

Season 2 of Insecure premiered on HBO last night. I just caught up with the new episode earlier this morning on my new best friend, HBOGO. And y’all, I just have to talk about it.


So, basically Issa’s still in the same place that she was at the end of last season. Just, you know, sans Lawrence.


Who is still as beautiful as ever.

She’s still working for that non-profit and living in the same place that her and Lawrence used to kick it at. The only thing that’s changed is that she’s started to date other guys. Each of them seems more and more irrelevant than the other. She tells Molly (and all of us) that she wants Lawrence back, but doubts it’ll happen. Even though they haven’t spoken in weeks she’s been trying to finesse Lawrence into seeing her again. Later, she gets super hyped up off of the fact a notice for jury duty came for Lawrence, so he HAS to come see her to pick it up.

Even though they haven’t spoken in weeks she’s been trying to finesse Lawrence into seeing her again. Later, she gets super hyped up off of the fact a notice for jury duty came for Lawrence, so he HAS to come see her to pick it up.


I was dying at that scene!

Meanwhile, Molly’s actually seeing a therapist even though she doesn’t seem to want to talk about her problems. But, isn’t that the point?  Then later, she finds a check that reveals her white male co-worker is making more than her. Molly is taking too many Ls in this episode and I’m not here for it. I want her to win!

And then there’s Lawrence. Ah, Lawrence. He’s staying at his friend’s crib while he’s “looking for an apartment”. He’s still working, which makes me happy. What surprised me, is that he’s still hooking up with Tanya (She’s that one girl that works at his job; I had to remind myself where she was from too). I personally thought that was going to be a one and done type of thing, but I was wrong y’all. It doesn’t seem to be an official thing from what his friend was saying, but Lawrence seems to like where he’s at with her. Probably cause there’s no risk and a whole bunch of reward.

But the last scene. THAT LAST SCENE.

Lawrence finally shows up at Issa’s place to get the jury duty mail and…things happen y’all!

I was like:


You better gon’ head girl!

But, I have so many questions for the rest of the season: What’s the future of Lawrence and Issa’s relationship looking like? Will Molly finally get the praise that she deserves at work? Will Issa’s Blood neighbor ever say a C word? 

All I know is that every week my butt will surely be on the living room couch every Monday night (or, Tuesday morning) getting my Insecure fix. I am hooked like a sea bass honey.

Do you watch Insecure? How’d you feel about the premiere episode? Do you have any other TV recommendations for me? Let me know in the comments section below. 


5 DOPE BOOKS ON MY TO-READ LIST ft. childhood reading flashbacks



Books and I were like peanut butter and bananas growing up.

I fondly remember our loving relationship stretching back to the blue skied and white clouded years of elementary school. Back then, I was obsessed with this thing called the AR (or, Accelerated Reading) program. Whenever you finished reading a book from my school’s library you could take a short (5-10 questions) test about the plot and characters. Depending on how well you did on the test and how challenging of a read it was, you’d get a certain amount of AR points.

I remember I used to read through books that were slightly harder to read but AR point heavy like this series about medieval mice.


I also remember speed-reading through other, less demanding books and taking 3-5 quizzes a week to rack up the points. Was I finessing the system? Probably. 

But at the end of the year there was the one, the only, the AR store. You could buy things like funky Lisa Frank-esque pencils, multicolored pencil erasers, and stuffed animals. But, what I usually had my eyes on were the posters. I specifically remember scoring this super awesome and totally not corny SpongeBob poster in particular, which I still have at my house (somewhere) to this very day.


What I’m trying to convey to y’all is that I’ve grown up on books. But recently, I’ve lost my passion for reading. It’s probably due to the strange attachment I’ve grown to have with my smart phone and social media. But, I’ve decided that now is the perfect time to jump back into the wild waters of reading.

Here are a couple books I’ve had my eye on:

  1. Charlamagne Tha God – Black Privilege: Opportunity Comes To Those Who Create It


2. Phoebe Robinson – You Can’t Touch My Hair: And Other Things I Still Have to Explain 


3. Issa Rae – The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl 


4. The Coldest Winter Ever – Sister Souljah


5. Game Over – Winter Ramos


I haven’t had a good page-turner in a while, and just looking at these books makes me excited to start. I plan to at least read a book or two by the time the fall season is upon us!

Do you remember the AR program? What did you used to read when you were a child? Do you read for fun now, if so what’s on your to-read list? Let me know down in the comments below. 


relationships and the beauty of authenticity feat. 21 savage & amber rose

There’s something rather exquisite about Atlanta rapper 21 Savage. Maybe it’s the upside down cross in the middle of his forehead.


Maybe it’s how he’s cashed in on his universal meme status. But, I think what’s grabbed my attention the most is his overflowing authenticity. Hip-hop is full of rappers that spit fallacies instead of facts. They know what is marketable and what the quintessential rapper looks like to the American public, so they try to fill that braggadocious gun-pelting persona like:


As I slowly dug myself into some of 21 Savage’s musical repertoire (the Metro Boomin buddy project Savage Mode and the recently dropped Issa Album) I realized that 21 Savage is ’bout that action. When I hear him say things like,

                                                                  Think I got em’ scared, shot em’ in the beard/That’s a chin check, I’m certified everywhere – Close My Eyes

I believe it with every fiber of my being. Even though his music isn’t exactly my cup of tea I can appreciate that he’s not afraid to speak his truth.

I feel the same way about 21 Savage’s current girlfriend, model Amber Rose.


I’m always silently rooting for in the wild, wonderful world of celebrity-dom. She’s an open book and has that perfectly crafted “idgaf” attitude when it comes to what people think of her. She’s often slut-shamed throughout the entertainment world and on various realms of social media.

(Literally just look up her name on any social media site, and you’ll see an endless amount of haters. Endless.)

But, she used these hateful words as the fire to fuel her annual women’s empowerment weekend Amber Rose’s SlutWalk. Obviously, I could go on and on about how much I love Amber Rose.

Recently, the seemingly sporadic relationship between 21 Savage and Amber Rose has been the talk of the internet. Everyone has an opinion (as they always do) about whether it’s “real” or not, if it’s going to last, and if they’re good together or not.


I think they are.

As you can hear at 0:45, she makes him take his vitamins. If bae don’t push you to take your vitamins then, what is you doing baby???

Jokes aside, what I get out of 21 and Amber’s relationship is when two authentic beings get together it’s easy to uplift one another and produce positivity.

In the beginning stages of relationships, I’ve seen that people often inflate themselves in order to impress the other person. It’s kind of like how peacocks attract mates.


It’s like when you’re on a first date and you’re talking about high school, and you say that you were homecoming queen but you were actually the 3rd runner up out of four girls. I’m not saying that’s the worst thing a person can do (we often all do this on some level). But, when you have space in a relationship to be your authentic self you can get so much more out of that bond. You become comfortable, let your flaws show, and you have the opportunity to grow so much more as a person.

As an outsider looking into their glass house made of Snapchats and radio interviews, 21 & Amber seem happy. And as a lover of love, that makes me happy too.

Have you seen 21 & Amber’s PDA all up in your social media feed? Who’s your favorite celebrity couple, past or present? Let me know who’s your #relationshipgoals. (Is that still a thing that people still say?)